Tuesday, February 19, 2013

ADHD?

We've always joked that Bub is ADD because BT and his brother are and so is their dad. And Bub has so many of the symptoms. But I was hoping it was just his age or his energy level or just being a boy and surely one day he would just grow out of it. But no.

Bub has been having a hard time at school. He can't sit still, always needing to move around or talk or do something and so always in trouble. Traditional school is really not for him but I don't have the money to put him a more active private school. It's becoming a problem. We have tried many many things to get him to "behave" but at this point I'm afraid his teacher and his school has written him off and I don't want that for my sweet boy. Yes, he is trouble sometimes and very high energy and he is too clever for his own good, but he is a sweet and loving boy. I've applied to some of the Schools of Choice in our area in the hopes that he can get in and maybe a more active learning style might help him. But he is so much sometimes that I really can't avoid it anymore. We are getting him tested for ADD/ADHD.

I never wanted to medicate him or change him. But his inability to sit down and focus is impending his learning and I don't want that. There is nothing wrong with him. He is just different. But it is the kind of different that most people can't handle. Hell sometimes I can't handle it. He is just constant. And he is not the kind of boy that school systems can handle. Schools and teachers need passivity. I understand why. 20 kids to teach and a limited time. One boy cannot disrupt others' learning all the time. It's not fair. But it's also not fair to Bub to make him feel like there is something wrong with him. Lately I've been noticing the language others (and myself. I am guilty too) use with him. Too much, something wrong, why can't you just. Because he can't. Literally. He just can't stop.

I have methods for getting him to stop, for getting him out of his "loops" as I call them. But not everyone can do that or will do that. And they certainly are not at school. His teacher asked what I do to get him to sit still like, for example, when doing homework. I don't make him sit still to do homework. I let him stand up and hop around. We have been practicing sitting still. But he is good for maybe 45 seconds, sometimes a minute.

So is he ADD/ADHD? I guess we will see what happens. I filled out the parent form and sent the teacher form to school. Then the doctor will review it and if he fits the criteria then he will call us in for an appointment. I don't know what I'm hoping for, just something to help my boy.

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