Sneaux Day

We are having an actual snow day today. There isn't very much snow, mostly freezing rain and sleet and lots of ice but there's been a little bit of snow fall and that's always exciting down here. I know most of the folks up north are sick of snow but it's not something that happens often around here. I think the last time might have been when Bub was 2 or 3. At any rate it's freezing outside and I'm glad that both are schools are closed and I don't have to drive out in this. If one thing can be counted on it's that people in southern Louisiana cannot handle too much cold and ice and snow are out of our range. Still it's nice to get a day home with my kids even if we are going to be watching TV most of the day.

Our "snow" day

A lesson in responsibility

I have a tendency to just do for Bub. I cajole him every morning into getting out of bed, into eating his breakfast, into getting dressed, into getting him into the car. Basically most of my morning is spent saying "Now you need to do this and then this and then this" over and over again. It was easier when he was a baby/toddler. I had to dress him and feed him. It was easier when he was a preschooler because even though he could dress himself I still felt like it was okay to do as much as I could for him to smooth the morning over. I spoiled him and it shows. But I'm tired now and he's at the age where he knows how the morning should go. He knows the routine. It's the same routine since he started school, since he started daycare actually. So I told him yesterday after getting fed up with repeating myself 5 times in a row. From now on he is responsible for his morning routine. I'll still get him up and give him his medicine and I'll give him time warnings but I'm not going to tell him what to do. He knows what to do. I expect him to do it.

This morning didn't go so well. First he refused to get out of bed till I dragged him out. Then he laid on the sofa till I gave a 10 minute warning and that's when he finally got dressed. And this was where I made a mistake. He wanted cereal and I gave it to him. Now I know how long it takes that child to eat a bowl of cereal and sure enough the time came and he had barely gotten into it. But I took it away and then went and found his glasses (on the floor *sigh*). I told him I was going out to the car. All he had to do was put on his shoes, grab a jacket, and his backpack and get out of the door. I waited a good while. He finally came out messing with the zipper. He'd been in the house finding a jacket and then trying to get it zipped. Great. Now we were really late and all on account of a zipper. We might have made it to the bus stop on time if there hadn't been a line of traffic and someone who refused to take a right turn out even when it was clear. I'm not sure what was happening in that car but it took forever to move and so we missed the bus. I followed the bus to the next stop but he missed it there too (despite getting out of the car and running, the driver didn't see him) so I sort of blindly followed the bus and he got it at the next stop. All of this making me 30 minutes late to work. In the meantime, I noticed Bub was not wearing his glasses. Where are the glasses? He forgot them. And that's when I lost it. I was already following the damn bus around town. I handed him his glasses. He put them down to get a jacket. Why didn't he put them on his face!? He didn't know. I told him I was really angry at him. First the bus, now the glasses. I expect better of him tomorrow.

So really who was at fault? Me for expecting a smooth morning the first time I put this much responsibility for his morning routine on him? Him for ignoring me all this time? Both probably. Tomorrow I will put a jacket out for him so he sees it right away. I will make sure his glasses are on his face and I will either make him eat in the car or get breakfast at school if there is only 5 minutes left. But I will again leave the rest up to him. I won't be able to do it all for him forever and it's time he learned to handle this.

One Word

Last year I choose "optimism/acceptance" as my word for the year. I don't know if I entirely succeeded in living out that word. I always have a desire for things to be better or easier or at least not as hard. But I tried my best and I feel like I'm in a decent place with work and home and the balance between. It also helped having one of the more negative influences at work move on and be replaced with a positive and fun person. I didn't realize how much she was bringing me down until she was gone.

But recently I read a book called We Were Liars by E. Lockhart and in it a supporting character tells the main character to be a little kinder than you have to and I have been thinking about that ever since. And when I googled that this quote from J.M. Barrie came up:

“Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.” So true.

So my word for this year is Kinder. I would like to be kinder. By nature I am generous. I liked making and giving and helping. But am I kind enough? I don't feel like I am. I can be so judgmental and harsh. Not about everything and not about everyone and not all the time but I have so many little moments that I wish I had been a different person, kinder in my attitude and my actions. I would like to be kinder to my co-workers especially the ones that give me the most trouble, and kinder to my kids and my husband especially when they are driving me crazy, and kinder to myself especially when I make mistakes. Personally I think the world could use a little more kindness and I am going to try to put that thought into action.

The Dinner Goal

Growing up we didn't have family dinner for a variety of reasons but we didn't eat many meals together.  My childhood home had a living room and a den. It also had a dining area off the kitchen that didn't see much use as near as I can remember. On the whole I ate alone in the living room especially once my sister got her own TV in her room. We all kind of went our own separate ways for dinner. It's sounds terrible but it wasn't. It was actually fine. It was when I meet my husband and ate at his parent's house that I realized that families do, in fact, eat dinner together at a table and not in front of the TV. It was something new for me. So dinner time became a much more together time. We've almost always had dinner time together and with no TV since we've lived together. There are always exceptions but as a rule.

Somehow lately I've let dinners take a downward turn. It began when BT started working nights as a special now and again thing that Bub and I did. Then it very slowly wound down into him where he could see the TV and then ended up with him eating at a TV tray while I ate dinner with Button at the table. GASP! I know, such poor parenting. I realized late last year what was happening and that I was letting it happen because it is just easier. But I let the year play out since he was vacation and all. But I explained to him what was going to happen when school started again. He was going to eat dinner with us at the table with no TV and no electronics. The same would go for me. Because along with letting him eat in front of the TV I was playing on my phone while I ate.

School started on Tuesday. He was not happy. He was doubly not happy to find me making him sit at the table and eat with me and his sister with nothing to entertain me. And you know what? It was fine. He talked to me and told me about school and his friends. It was really nice. Last night BT was home and so we all sat down at the table. Bub wanted to play on his new tablet but I told him no. He pouted but it was good. I think once he realizes that this is a permanent thing he will be cool with it. He's a fairly adaptable child. And eating in the living room can go back to being a special treat instead of the norm. This might turn out to be the easiest goal of them all.

Seven times (The Healthy Goal)

How many times have I written this post? About being healthy, losing weight, doing something to feel better about me. I'm afraid, to be honest, that I will keep writing this post which means I will keep starting over rather than sticking to it. But I said that a goal of mine this year is to get healthy and part of that is losing weight and becoming more active. I was going to join Weight Watchers to start but if I'm being honest right now I don't want to spend that money. Can you put a price on your own health? No, but I can refrain from spending $50 right now that I could use for something else like dinner or gas or dentistry for my child. Instead I downloaded My Fitness Pal, a free app that lets put in your goals and keep track of all that you eat, drink, exercise, etc. You can put in how much weight you want to lose (1 lb a week for me) and it will calculate how many calories to consume in a day. It also factors in any exercise that you do. It reminds me of the Weight Watchers online but there are no points. Frankly I like points. It's easier for me to keep track of points in my head but until I decided to put down the money on that system, this will have to do. I decided to start on my first day back at work because I can only eat what I bring in contrast to being at home where I have all that food (haha like we have food in our house) available. So how's that working out? Not too bad. But it's only day 2 and I'm fighting the urge to be negative about the whole thing and just try.

I did get up yesterday and do a 30 minute walking workout video and I'm proud of that. I was going to get up again this morning for Pilates but last night was the coldest night we are probably going to have all year and I was loathed to drag myself out of my warm bed plus I somehow hurt my foot. But my plan is to definitely do cardio (like a walking video) at least 3 times a week and then intersperse Pilates or yoga in the days in between. If I don't do the Pilates or yoga then it's whatever because right now I'm viewing them as bonus and the cardio is really what I am looking for.

Right now I am cautiously hopeful about this whole thing. I went for a long time with excercising everyday and I know that I can do it again. I just have to believe in myself and get some stick-to-itness in my attitude

Adventures in Potty Training

So here's what I learned on the preliminary potty training day with Button. She's not ready. She not only refused to sit on the potty but managed to hold it from 8:30 to 11:30 til I put a diaper on her for her nap. At that point I don't want to say I gave up but I figure out that she wasn't ready yet. I think she is on her way and I really wanted to give her an idea of what it feels like to go. I know that it is hard for them when they are use to diapers. She did enjoy wearing the underwear and had absolutely no trouble peeing in them and then getting me to change her. She enjoyed running away from me and being half naked even more. Toddlers, the original nudists. So I will revisit the potty training another day. Maybe closer to her 2nd birthday.

Preliminary Potty Training

So today begins Day 1 of potty training for Button. I'm honestly not expecting to come out of this with a fully potty trained 21 month old. But I'm home and it's seems like a good time to introduce her to the concept. I'm fully armed with 9 pairs of training pants and a willingness to spend a lot of time cleaning up messes. We took down the potty from the attic about 2 weeks ago and she was very interested, spending some time sitting on it and even accidentally peeing once. But since then she's grown use to it so I don't know how this is going to go. The internet tells me that I can potty train a child in 3 days. I think the internet is working with a child who is on the other side of 2. But my mom tells me that I was around this age when I potty trained and I am slightly hopeful because she is always interested in doing what her brother is doing. At the very least she will start to learn when she is "going" and maybe making her aware will be helpful down the line. I think that there is a window of opportunity with kids to get this done. We waited too long for Bub looking for all the signs they tell you to look for, starting closer to 3, and he was 3 1/2 when he was finally fully potty trained. Maybe if we had tried sooner, it would have happened sooner. Who knows? But I am willing to keep trying with Button starting now in order to find that window a whole lot sooner than 3 1/2.

But how awesome would it be to not have to deal with diapers ever again? If she was fully potty trained by her 2nd birthday... a mother can dream.

Happy New Year (playing catchup)

Happy 2014! I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season. Ours has been pretty busy but fun. Christmas we spent with my family and everyone enjoyed all their presents. Bub and I received archery sets but we've only got to shoot a few times, mostly because of the rain. Button's been enjoying her new barn and dollhouse and Bub's favorite present is the Kindle Fire my sister got him (she spoils him). 

Yesterday for New Year's Eve we took the kids to the local childrens museum to their New Year's Noon party. It was super crowded but they had fun. At noon, the museum does a countdown and then confetti and toys fall out of balls hanging from the ceiling. They have outdoor carnival games and then all the regular museum exhibits too. This is the 3rd time we've gone and Bub likes it. Then last night the kids and I went to dinner with my parents and sister and had some seafood. It was a long wait but the food was good. We made it home early and not one of the three of us saw the new year come in. I think BT was the only one awake.

Today we had lunch with my parents and spent some more time over there since my sister is going back home this afternoon. It's been a fairly quiet day. We watched LSU play and then we left before she did since Button was desperately in need of a nap. My plans for the rest of the day include doing nothing. It's been a whirlwind of activity since winter break started and I think we need some downtime at home. And anyway I think we need to rest up since tomorrow starts day 1 of a preliminary attempt at potty training. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to involve a lot of cleaning up.