A sickly moment of dark surprise

The other day was my uncle's birthday, the one who died from cancer in 2007.  He would have been 61.  I still miss him as does my family.  It's hard sometimes.  Sometimes I am still surprised by how much I miss him.  I've had other family members die, grandparents, other aunt, a cousin, but I don't miss them the way I do him.  I guess because I didn't see them often.  But I saw my uncle almost every week.  His is the first death that effected my everyday life.  I try to think of the things that we used to talk about or the stories he would tell.  I wish he could see how Bub is growing up and I think they would like each other.  I don't know.  I just feel sad about it still.  He was a good man and it was a shame he had to go when he did.   We all still miss him and love him and I hope he knows that.

"It is a curious thing, the death of a loved one. We all know that our time in this world is limited, and that eventually all of us will end up underneath some sheet, never to wake up. And yet it is always a surprise when it happens to someone we know. It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try and readjust the way you thought of things."
— Lemony Snicket (Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid)